TopTV where4 art thou?

TopTV don't want my bottom dollar.

And all I wanted was ZEE Classic and everything else.

After two days trying to dial their call centre (with calls not going through) and my e-mail queries receiving no response, I've lost faith in TopTV.

All I needed to know was whether the most expensive (R249) bouquet had  ZEE Classic. (Cos I know the cheapest one at R99 did).

I also wanted to enquire as to whether the R249 bouquet was (like DStv Premium at R519) a collection of programming from all their primary bouquets offerings.

If it were, this would've been awesome and I would have signed up with the new TV content provider immediately.

However, answers were in the ether.  

They'd staged a huge media launch with nothing to show for it and with DStv hijacking the process with their competitive offerings announcement.
So for the moment I'll just have to do with DStv Premium, the North Indian and Portuguse bouquets.

I could have had a TopTV weekend ... instead a night on the town beckons. All is well Not!

goldencityvoice@gmail.com

Kevin Singh is a white man - 4 Reel

 

Can a SA Indian who becomes white get away with bloody murder?

Such forms the basis of Kevin Singh's third movie.

In The Chameleon Kevin plays Dr Sunil Singh a good doctor gone bad.

All in the name of revenge.

AWB-styled thugs killed his wife Eileen just because she was black.

Karmically, on the same night the brazen attack took place, our good doctor just happens to be shagging a patient. An aging Caucasian Sandton hooker. (Well that's what she looked like in the quick cuts which juxtaposed their sexcapade with the violent attack on Mrs Singh).

All in all, Kevin has succeeded in making a movie that sends the middle finger to the Broken Promises and its ilk out there.

Not to say such were awful movies. But Kevin took the serious drama route as opposed to a hammy comedy as his genre of choice.

The Chameleon was inspired by Barend Strydom racist killings.

 The Strydom incident, twenty two years ago on November 15, 1988, was, arguably, a turning point for South Africa.  

Fifteen innocent people were gunned down by Strydom, the leader of the Wit Wolve, on that tragic day.The world fixed its gaze on apartheid SA once more.

The leader of what he called Wit Wolve (White Wolves) was sentenced to death for his crimes but set free by Nobel Laureate FW de Klerk four years later.

"The incident threw racist SA into the spotlight - once more - forcing the hand of De Klerk and his apartheid cronies to set the ball rolling and release anti-apartheid figurehead Nelson Mandela and others. Unlike Sharpeville or Soweto, where active resistance against the regime saw innocents slaughtered, the Strydom killings gave the naked racism of apartheid a face. Fifteen people were gunned down senselessly," said Kevin.

"The movie uses the Strydom incident as a catalyst for Dr Sunil who seeks revenge for the murder of his wife Eileen. While the film is not prescriptive it opens the door for discussion. The black anti-hero must go through surgery to become a white man so he can kill freely. However, like the case with Stockholm Syndrome, the black man begins to fall for his white enslaver - his face!"

The flick, at 100 minutes, played at The Labia, on Kloof, and at a Ster Kinelor cinema in Gauteng - both for one night each. For more news on its screening e-mail queries to goldencityvoice@gmail.com

Mervyn's on the Ball - Sepp Blatter's to be Specific!

He's had his eye firmly on balls from a young age - not very long ago.

"Ï grew up munching mince samoosas and drinking copious amounts of tea watching nailbiting Manchester United matches at home. Öff course I spent more time biting my nails when their ball missed its mark,"said soccer supremo journalist Mervyn Naidoo.

A man of great modesty, Mervyn's also had "ä long standing history with football".

"Having played various codes from an early age and later moved into senior administrative positions, I must say I'm crazy 'bout dem balls," said Mervyn. 

And it got him far. Tickets to all the FIFA World Cup 2010 games in Durban. (Bloody showoff!)

He justifies: "Notably I was the Vice President of the Safa Chatsworth Football Association until 2008. And I've also been writing quite a bit on football. So I guess I was a natural choice to be chosen as soccer scribe for SAFA." (Ja, he deserves a medal).

The man of the moment is hot on the heels of global footballers.

What with been given FIFA accreditation to cover their beautiful game in South Africa. (While we'll have to make do with a billion of fellow plebs across the globe and watch it on the idiot box!)

The intrepid soccer writer is relentless in his pursuit of that ultimate story.

And he has pages to prove it. Many.

He writes for Sunday Tribune in KwaZulu Natal, POST and a soccer rag.

 "A lot of my energy goes towards covering Premier Soccer League (PSL) activities as well as Bafana Bafana's fortunes."

(Bastard gets to watch the games for free).

Much of this modest showoff's work is published in SA's largest football read - Kickoff Magazine and its popular website. 

"I also do similar work for Soccer Laduma and it website. Soccer Laduma is the largest football publication in Africa. Often, Ï provide breaking match reports to the South African Press Agency (SAPA) on all PSL matches played in KZN."

(OK you got the tickets! You made your point).

 "As a result of my extensive PSL coverage, I was one of fifteen football journalists from around the country chosen by ABSA (sponsors of the PSL) to adjudicate this season's 'Player and Coach' of the year awards," he droned on.

"Sapa have enlisted me as their correspondent for all FIFA World Cup matches to be staged in Durban. I have a long standing history with sport, having played various codes from an early age and later moved into senior administrative positions. Notably I was the Vice President of the Safa Chatsworth Football Association until 2008," he repeats himself.

*** Seriously though, the entire team (of one man and an email address for now) at Golden City Voice wishes Mervyn Naidoo well over the FIFA World Cup 2010. We know it's gonna be hard work, frigging hard work, keeping track of all those calories he'll pick up at the buffet at the Presidential Suite at Moses Mahbida Stadium. Good luck!!

Page 3 girl: Rizelle J - Salt of the Earth!

CUT OUT for stardom. Our page three girl, Rizelle Januk is a talent to croak about!

Cut from the cloth of third generation performers (maybe even four) she's proved to be a natural born performer and new beauty queen hopeful on a quest to Save The Frogs. (They protest they've been kissed too much).

The Westville-based dancer was recently selected to represent Durban in the Miss Earth SA in association with Consol finals to take place shortly.

Blessed with fab moves, the energetic Hrithik Roshan fan is sure having a grand time with her beauty-with-a-purpose pursuits.

Rizelle J recently highlighted Save The Frogs day on Saturday. The Citizen newspaper featured her on page one while the Mercury on page five - both on Friday.

With all the May Day prioritising and what with the 150 year Indian Arrivals celebrations backstabbings by the rival committees claiming to represent SA Indians, Rizelle J got it right and stayed out of the debate.

The 1860 Foundations could take a hop or a few with their "save our committee" games as they picked out the knives from each others' backs.

Bravo Rizelle J, dancer, singer, actor extraordinaire!

She chose to save a species more endangered than the kosher Sudan Red (manja/hurdee/turmeric) that tattoos your hand for a week after indulging in an Orientals' bunny at the Workshop. More endangered than locals lured to extinction by India's Green Card scheme.

So as we wish Miss Rizelle J all the best for the finals, let's, like her, spare a thought for the frogs.

For if it were not for them, whom would we have had to kiss to find our elusive prince/ess?

FOCUS ON 'CHAROUS' & AD-VERSE EFFECTS

GCV OPINION

A RECENT spate of television adverts capitalises on the quirkiness of being "Indian".

And, to be frank, this quirkiness lies in the eye of the ad creator - in most cases, non South African of  Indian origin.

The chasm between the cardboard characters we see in the ads versus real people we encounter everyday are often pretty huge.

SA Indians are much more varied than those speaking with thick accents or those wanting to get their daughters married off.

The Diski dance ad with two "charous" fishing on a pier are case in point.

The key characteristics of monosyllabic, Indian fisherman who smak a move (by the way that dance which just may cause a feva is uber camp) is stereotyped, dated, unclever. Thank God it's quick and painless before the visuals focus on the team tipped to embarass the nation in the FIFA 2010 World Cup.

The other ad under the spotlight is the one featuring the Caucasian infiltrating a SA Indian home and wedding or such celebration and leaving with containers of free food at the end. So if FNB thinks its money is on the mark on reading SA Indians, it better rethink its strategy. We've more important things on mind than finding a suitor for our daughters: like the rugby scores, who's Liverpool gonna thrash tonight and would the other half appreciate the pasta I am making (with me in mind) for dinner tonight?